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[文化][健身健美][英中对照]健美大神之路 31 摆正心态

一线实稿 樊明璨 来源:樊明璨博客 185浏览 0评论

健美大神之路(A Bodybuilder Is Born)

作者:罗恩·哈利斯(Ron Harris)

译者:樊明璨

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Episode 31 – The Mind Game Of Competitive Bodybuilding
第31篇 摆正心态

Despite my experience being electronically crucified on more than one occasion on popular bodybuilding message boards on the Internet, I still cruise around them to see what’s going on in my little muscle world. The net is still a wonderful tool for the rapid dissemination of information.
尽管我曾不止一次被网上健美论坛抹黑,但我仍然浏览这些论坛,看看健美界发生了什么新鲜事。网络是一个快速传播信息的奇妙工具。

In the old days, bodybuilders had to wait for weeks, sometimes months, for the magazines to come out to find out who had won the latest contest like the Mr. Olympia. Why, until the advent of the telegraph and the telephone in the late 19th Century, all we had to deliver news were the Pony Express, the railroad, and ships and barges.
过去,健美运动员们必须等待数周,有时数月,才能买到新出的杂志,了解到谁赢了奥林匹亚先生等最新赛况。不过,在19世纪晚期电报和电话出现前,我们传递信息的工具仅限驿马快信、铁路、轮船和驳船。

When Mortimer H. Henckenfuster won the Mr. Physically Robust Gentleman in October of 1884 in Las Vegas (population at the time: 4), muscle fans on the East Coast didn’t get the full contest report until the week before the 1885 edition of the show. Mortimer stood 5-foot-11 and tipped the scales at a paltry 160 pounds, a far cry from Ronnie Coleman’s 296 at the same height.
当摩帝马·H·亨肯福斯特(Mortimer H. Henckenfuster)1884年10月赢得拉斯维加斯(当时人口数:4)健美先生时,东海岸的健美粉丝们直到1885年赛前一周才获得完整赛报。摩帝马身高5.11英尺,体重仅160磅,远不及罗尼在同样身高时的296磅。

I believe Henckenfuster also used to promote a ‘health tonic’ with questionable ingredients such as bear urine, gorilla poop, and the gunk from the corner of a lion’s eyes when it wakes up in the morning (gathered, no doubt, on his rounds as a zookeeper).
摩帝马以前常宣扬一种“保健品”,但其熊尿、大猩猩粪便、狮子早上醒来时的眼屎等成分(无疑是做动物园管理员轮班时收集的)比较不靠谱。

Apparently it didn’t do him much good, since he died in 1901 at the age of 38. Medicine wasn’t so advanced in those days, so the cause of death was listed only as something called ‘melancholy spleen.’ Ah, the good old days.
很明显,这东西并没有给他带来多少好处,因为他1901年便去世了,享年38岁。由于当时医学并不十分发达,所以死因只说是“脾郁”云云。哎,往日如梦。

Ron Harris:
But back to 2005 and the travails of my protege, Randy. I was cruising around my favorite message board, one I will call Muscle Madness, when something led me to the section on upcoming NPC events. It must have been my Spidey sense, as I haven’t so much as glanced at that area of the site in many months.
罗恩·哈利斯:
言归正传,说说2005年我徒弟兰迪的烦恼吧。我当时正在逛一个我最喜欢的我将其称为“肌肉疯狂”(Muscle Madness)的论坛,这时一个帖子将我引到即将到来的美国国家体格委员会赛事这个版块。这肯定是我的第六感显灵了,因为我都好多个月没看过一眼该网站的这片区域了。

The thread, as each individual topic is called, was titled “Anyone else doing the New England?” The screen name under the thread topic, indicating the starter, was FordMuscle250. Hmm. Randy sold Ford cars, he was a young muscle man, and 250 happened to be what he wishes he weighed. I was almost certain it was the little rascal, and when I opened up the thread my suspicions were confirmed. I have copied and pasted it here exactly as it appeared:
这个帖子(即一个单独的话题)标题叫“还有其他人参加新英格兰的比赛吗?”帖子下方显示的网名(即发帖人)是FordMuscle250。兰迪是销售福特(Ford)汽车的,年轻的肌肉(Muscle)男一枚,250正好是他希望达到的重量。我几乎肯定就是兰迪这个小屁孩,点开帖子后更加确定了我的猜测。我把帖子内容原样复制粘贴如下:

Randy:
“Hey, what’s up. Anybody out there doing the New Englands on May 8? What weight class? I’ll be a light heavy and this is my first show. Post some pics up!”
兰迪:
“嗨,大家好。有人参加5月8日新英格兰的比赛吗?哪个重量级?我参加轻重量级的,这次是我的首秀。发点图让大家看看!”

Ron Harris:
Randy, of course, did not feel the need to disclose his weight class, or to provide a photo of his own. And I knew why. This thread was cleverly (or so he thought) disguised as good-natured camaraderie among local competitors. As if. With 15 weeks left to go until the show, he was already freaking out about who he might have to go up against in the open light-heavies.
罗恩·哈利斯:
兰迪当然并不觉得有需要泄露自己的重量级并上传自己的照片。但他这样做了,我知道为什么。这个帖子巧妙地(至少在他看来如此)伪装成寻找本地参赛的好基友。表面上仿佛是这样,但实际上,他已经抓狂地急切想知道谁会在轻重量级公开赛上成为他的竞争对手,尽管离比赛开始还有15周。

I know what he wanted in his desperate state of mind. Randy was secretly hoping that every other guy he would be competing against would find their way to this thread and post up photos. Wait, that’s not all of it. What he really wanted was for all of them to suck, and suck bad. He wanted to see guys with pot bellies, stick legs, concave chests, lats so high they inserted just under the armpits, and arms that looked like they belonged on Urkel.
我明白他备受煎熬的心里在打什么小算盘。兰迪背地里希望其他竞争对手会看到这个帖子然后上传他们的照片。不过还没完,他真正想看到的其实是这些人比他垃圾,远远比他垃圾。他想看到他们肚子上有赘肉,双腿骨瘦如柴,胸大肌平平,腋下背阔肌狭小,手臂细得跟史蒂夫·乌尔克尔(Steve Urkel)的一样。

Hold on, the actor Jaleel White might have had some guns underneath his nerdy clothes, so make that Horshak. For you younger readers, Horshak begat Screech, and Screech begat Urkel in the Old Testament of TV sitcom dorks. And if you’re too young to even know the show Family Matters, maybe you need to stop reading this for a minute so mommy can change your stinky diaper and offer you a bottle of warm Similac.
慢着,男星杰里尔·怀特(Jaleel White)可能还是有点二头肌,只不过被他穿的学究气衣服给掩盖了,霍尔斯哈克(Horshak)也是如此。给年轻的朋友科普一下,在老一辈的电视情景喜剧书呆子中,先有霍尔斯哈克,才有斯格里奇(Screech),有了斯格里奇,才有乌尔克尔。如果你年龄太小,没听过《家庭对抗》(Family Matters)这部电视剧,也许你该暂停阅读本文,这样妈妈才好更换你的臭尿片并喂你吃温热的雅培牛奶。

Randy was so insecure and doubtful of his chances at the show that he was praying for an easy win over a field of bodybuilding misfits.
兰迪对比赛赢面感到不安和难以预测,他渴望竞争对手都有这样那样的不足从而轻松赢得比赛。

But as I explained in a previous episode, that was not going to happen at the New England. We only have one NPC show a year in the state of Massachusetts, with a population of six million people and five million Dunkin Donuts franchises.
但正如我在之前的一篇文章中说过的,这种事不会发生在新英格兰。马萨诸塞州的美国国家体格委员会比赛一年只有一次,而该州有6百万人口和5百万个唐恩都乐特许经销店。

This is only one of the several New England states, of course. Others include New Hampshire, Rhode Island, and several more where nobody pronounces their R’s, and directions are often given in terms of landmarks (when you see the tree that looks like a giraffe, turn left and go five miles until you come to a field with an abandoned ’72 Pinto on its side).
当然,这还只是新英格兰的其中一个州。其他还有新罕布什尔州、罗德岛州,以及几个居民说话不发R音和对地标给出了方向(看到像长颈鹿的树时向左转再走5英里到达一片边上有一辆被遗弃的72年福特平托车的旷野)的州。

What I’m trying to say is that since there are so few contests for the bodybuilders in our region of the USA to choose from, the shows tend to be packed, and there is never a shortage of talent. It wasn’t going to be easy at all for Randy, despite the improvements he had made to his physique in the time I had known him.
我想说的是,既然在美国可供健美选手选择的比赛如此之少,那参赛者多半爆满,绝不乏能人,兰迪想赢绝不容易,尽管认识他以来他在体格上已有所进步。

Sure enough, soon a few of the other guys doing the contest started responding to the thread. I knew Randy was growing increasingly distressed, as it was obvious from some of the photos that there were some big dudes getting ready for the show. It was tough for me not to contact Randy, but I had to wait for him to come to me. These days we don’t get to train more than once a week together, and sometimes it’s every other week.
果然,很快就有几个参赛的人回复了这个帖子。我知道兰迪会变得越发苦恼,因为部分照片表明有好几个大块头的家伙已准备好参赛。看来不找兰迪谈谈心不行了,但我得等他自己来找我。近期我们一起训练的日子一周不超过一次,有时两周才一次。

Close to two weeks had gone by since I had noticed his thread before we met to hit chest and shoulders. In that time, close to a dozen men and four women had announced their intent to do the New England, and most had provided photos, both of how they presently looked, and shots from previous contests they had done.
从我注意到他的帖子以来过了将近两周,我们才见到面,一起练胸和肩。当时,已有差不多10几个男的和4个女的表示有意参赛,而且大多上传了照片,不仅有当前状态的照片,还有以前参赛的照片。

Four and possibly five of the men were going to be in the light-heavies. The fifth one wasn’t sure if he was going to make weight. But they all looked – how should I put it? They looked like they could all potentially kick Randy’s ass all over the stage. Randy really belonged in a Novice division, but the contests around these parts just don’t have those.
有4个或者可能5个男的将参加轻重量级比赛项目,有个人还不确定是否要减重,但他们都看起来——怎么说呢——有可能让兰迪在台上无地自容。兰迪真的只适合参加新手组比赛,但各赛区的比赛都没有设新手组。

Randy:
“I don’t know about the show,” Randy started as he warmed up on the incline barbell.
兰迪:
“我不知道到时还能不能参赛。”兰迪用杠铃上斜卧推热身时说。

Ron Harris:
“You’re doing the show,” I said coldly.
罗恩·哈利斯:
“你要参赛。”我冷冷地说。

Randy:
“The thing is, my work is getting really busy right now, you know spring is our biggest time of the year at the dealership,” he said as he racked the weight.
兰迪:
“问题是我的工作现在真的很忙,你知道的,春季是一年中的销售旺季。”他一边把杠铃归位,一边说道。

Ron Harris:
“I saw your thread on Muscle Madness, jackass.”
罗恩·哈利斯:
“我看到你在肌肉疯狂论坛上发的帖子了,亲。”

Randy:
“You, ah, you saw that?”
兰迪:
“你——你看到那个帖子了?”

Ron Harris:
“Yep,” I replied as I slid on more weight for me. “You’re getting cold feet because you saw what you’re up against.” I did my last warm-up set.
罗恩·哈利斯:
“对,”我一边加重量片一边说,“你不是工作忙,你是怕了,因为你觉得竞争对手太强大。”我做了最后一组热身组。

Randy:
“Well shit, did you see that Rocky kid?” he whined. “He looks like a pro, for God’s sake. His arms must be twenty-two inches.”
兰迪:
“是的,mama的,你看到那个叫洛基的家伙了吗?”他抱怨道,“他看起来像个职业选手,天啊,他的臂围肯定有22英寸。”

Ron Harris:
“He said he was five-six and he’s planning on weighing about 185, so I kinda doubt his arms are anywhere near that. But they are pretty big and have good shape,” I agreed.
罗恩·哈利斯:
“他说他身高5.6英尺,打算将体重减到185磅,所以我不太相信他的臂围会有那么大,但他的手臂肌肉的确发达,形状也很好。”

Randy:
“And that Tom guy? What the hell? He won this show a few years ago, why is he even doing it again? What a jerk-off!”
兰迪:
“还有那个叫汤姆的,我靠,几年前他就赢过这比赛,搞不懂为什么又来了?真是个逗逼!”

Randy did his set, face set in anger. This wasn’t the usual aggression generated and directed at the weights. He was furious at these guys for having the audacity to be entering the same weight division as him, and already conceding defeat – although things did look grim. Not as grim as the chances of a long and happy marriage for Paris Hilton, but grim nonetheless. It was time to give him the advice that I never was able to follow myself. Isn’t that what mentors are for?
兰迪愤怒地完成了他的热身组——脸部热身组。这不是常见的针对体重的攻击。他愤怒的是这些人居然厚颜无耻地来参加他这个重量级的比赛,而他已经不情愿地认输了——尽管形势看起来的确很严峻。虽然还没严峻到跟帕丽斯·希尔顿(Paris Hilton)获得长久美满婚姻的概率一样,但依然严峻。是时候告诉他我也从未能认同自己了,导师的作用正在于此。

Ron Harris:
“You need to stop worrying about these other guys, seriously. People don’t understand that bodybuilding is really more of a mind game than it is lifting weights and eating chicken breasts and broccoli.
罗恩·哈利斯:
“别再为其他人而烦恼了。你要明白,健美不仅仅是负重训练和吃鸡胸西兰花,更是一场心理博弈。

Unless you know for sure that you are so incredible that no other human has a chance of beating you, it’s only natural to worry about who you are going to go up against and what they will look like.
对竞争对手是谁及其实力感到焦虑都是正常的,除非你确信自己叼到无人能敌。

But this does nothing to make you look better on the day of your show. In fact, the constant stress might actually cause you to lose some muscle, and the worrying distracts you from what should be your real focus, getting into the best condition you can.”
但这并不能让你在比赛那天看上去更强。实际上,持续的压力可能会导致你掉肌肉,而焦虑会让你在正事上分心,从而无法进入最佳状态。”

Randy:
“But those guys,” Randy cried, “I can’t beat them!”
兰迪:
“但那些家伙太强了,”兰迪大声说,“我赢不了!”

Ron Harris:
“Maybe and maybe not,” I said. “I have been through this a few times myself so I can give you some insight. Some of these people will drop out of the show. They might get scared, they might get injured, lose their job, their cat might get sick, who knows. That’s one thing. Another thing is that not everybody gets in shape.
罗恩·哈利斯:
“也许是这样,也许不是,”我说,“这种情况我亲身经历过好几次,我可以告诉你一些我观察到的情况。一方面,这些人中有一部分人会中途退出比赛,可能是因为害怕了、受伤了、丢工作、猫病了等等;另一方面,不是所有人都状态良好。

Some guy you are biting your nails over might show up smooth as a baby’s butt, and you will feel like an idiot for worrying about him all that time. Others are only showing themselves from certain angles, or from the waist up, so they could be hiding significant physique flaws.
一些你现在感到难以与其抗衡的人可能现身的时候肌肉平滑得跟婴儿屁股一样,你会感到自己像个白痴花那么多时间顾虑他。还有一些人只从某个角度展示自己,比如只展示上半身,所以他们可能隐藏了重大的体格缺陷。

I’m not trying to make you think you’re going to have an easy time up there, because you won’t. This is your first contest, and you will be up against guys who have been doing this a lot longer than you have. And the light heavyweight are always a tough class in any show. That’s where the guys with the really nice blend of size and shape often show up.
我说这些并不是想让你觉得比赛会很容易,因为对你而言不会。这是你第一次参赛,而你面对的竞争对手都是久经沙场的老手。而且,轻重量级在任何比赛中一向都是竞争惨烈的级别,经常会看到一些肌肉块头和形状都非常棒的选手。

Many times the light heavy wins the Overall.” Randy was crestfallen, and I had to perk him up before he started looking for the nearest bridge to jump off of. The Tobin Bridge was only about 15 miles away, and that sucker has a long drop down.
很多时候都是轻重量级选手赢得全场总冠军。”见兰迪一副垂头丧气的样子,我得让他振作起来,免得他跳桥什么的。相距15英里远的地方就有一座托宾大桥,下落距离也很长。

“Here’s what I want you to do, Randy. Stay off that thread, because it’s only going to mess with your head. Just worry about you. It doesn’t matter if you win, take fifth, or dead last this time, as long as you get in the best shape you can and present yourself on stage like a veteran. We’ll work on your quarter turns and mandatories after the workout for a solid hour, and you will need to devote at least a half-hour of posing practice every day on your own. One other thing …”
“亲,我希望你按我说的去做。别再看那个帖子了,免得心烦意乱。我只是担心你。能不能赢不重要,这次拿个第五或最后一名都行,只要你达到最佳状态并老练地在台上展现自己即可。训练一小时后我们练练直角转体和规定动作,你自己每天至少要用半小时来练习肌肉展示动作。还有就是……”

Randy:
“What’s that?” he asked.
兰迪:
“还有什么?”他问道。

Ron Harris:
“Got your checkbook on you, junior?” He gave me a strange look. Perhaps I was going to charge him for all the training and advice, making it retroactive for the past two and a half years?
罗恩·哈利斯:
“随身带支票簿了吗,亲?”他用奇怪的眼神看了我一眼。也许将来我会对过去两年半来的所有训练和教导向他收取费用。

Randy:
“Yeah, out in my car, why?”
兰迪:
“带了,在车里,要支票簿干嘛?”

Ron Harris:
“Great.” I dug around in the plastic bag I carry around the gym floor with all my wraps, straps, training log, and assorted junk I need when I train. I produced an entry form and an envelope, already addressed to the promoter of the New England and with a stamp.
罗恩·哈利斯:
“太好了,”我在健身时随身携带的塑料包里四处摸索,这个包里装有我训练时需要用到的头巾、带子、训练日记及各种杂物。我从包里掏出了一张报名表和一个信封,信封上已经注明寄给新英格兰比赛的主办方并贴好了邮票。

“When we’re done today, you’re going to fill this out, we are going to go to your car, and you are going to write a check for your entry fee. Then I am going to mail it. You’re doing the show.” Randy looked relieved, as if a burden had been lifted from him.
“今天练完后你把这个表填一下,然后我们去你车上开一张报名费的支票,之后我就把这封信寄出去,你就可以参加比赛了。”兰迪如释重负。

Randy:
“I owe you, Ron. I had the wrong attitude about this thing.”
兰迪:
“谢谢你,教练,我之前对比赛的心态不太端正。”

Ron Harris:
“Yes you did. And you do owe me – thirty-seven stamps for the postage.”
罗恩·哈利斯:
“的确是这样,而且你的确要感谢我,因为我给你付了邮费——好多张37美分的邮票。”

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