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[文化][健身健美][英中对照]健美大神之路 42 年末两思

一线实稿 樊明璨 来源:樊明璨博客 213浏览 0评论

健美大神之路(A Bodybuilder Is Born)

作者:罗恩·哈利斯(Ron Harris)

译者:樊明璨

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Episode 42 – A Year In Muscle!
第42篇 年末两思

Christmas had come and gone. For Christmas Eve, we had the traditional dinner at my sister-in-law’s house. Traditional, that is, if you were raised in Puerto Rico, as most of her husband’s family was. The house was packed wall to wall (no doubt exceeding local fire codes), and the stereo blasting salsa and merengue music at ear-splitting levels was accompanied by a makeshift band playing bongos, a trumpet, and some odd instruments that involved banging a cowbell and scraping a ridged piece of wood.
圣诞节已经过去了。平安夜那晚,我们在我嫂子家吃了传统晚餐。所谓传统,是指波多黎各传统,嫂子老公的大多数家人都是波多黎各人。屋子里当时挤满了人(无疑超出了当地的消防规定),一支临时乐队用小手鼓、小号及一些奇特乐器(如敲打牛铃,摩擦木质脊形物等)演奏着震耳欲聋的萨尔萨(salsa)和梅伦格(merengue)音乐。

The overall decibels created by this ruckus were roughly equivalent to standing under a jet taking off. We left at 1 AM and the party was still going strong, as the alcohol hadn’t run out. At one point, I had actually touched my cheek to make sure blood wasn’t trickling out of my eardrum from the ungodly din. So much for ‘silent night, holy night.’
整个嘈杂度不亚于站在一架正在起飞的喷气式飞机下。我们凌晨1点离开时,派对仍然很热闹,因为酒没喝完。我之前摸过脸颊,确认脸上没有因耳膜被这过高的嘈杂声震破流出的血。平安夜神圣而静谧,嗨到这个点已经差不多了。

Christmas had been a great day for my kids. My daughter had gotten an iPod Nano, which would allow her to more effectively ignore us when we told her to clean her room or do her homework.
圣诞节那天,孩子们过得都很开心。我们送了一个iPod Nano给女儿,这下倒好,我们叫她打扫自己房间或做家庭作业,她更不当我们存在了。

My son got a bunch of toys, but the king of them all was RoboRaptor, a remote-control robot dinosaur. He had been ecstatic for about ten minutes, until he started whining that he needed a second RoboRaptor to do battle with this one. How could we have been so inconsiderate? Gratitude ain’t what it used to be.
我们送了一堆玩具给儿子,里面最棒的要属那个遥控机器恐龙。一开始他乐坏了,但约十分钟后,他便嚷着还要一个才好对战。我们怎么就没考虑到这点呢?儿子略感失望。

The Eye Of The Storm
风口浪尖

Now we were in the weird in-between week, after Christmas, but before New Year’s. Unfortunately for my wife, her birthday was smack dab in the middle of it.
这周比较特殊,正好处在圣诞之后元旦之前。不幸的是,我老婆的生日恰好就在这周。

She was used to family members being too financially devastated from buying gifts for the two hundred assorted children (Latin families tend to be large) to get her anything. I had at least bought her a very nice white/gold necklace this year. Well, that is to say, she bought it with my credit card and told me later, so close enough.
她的家人因为要给两百个不同的孩子买礼物(拉丁家族往往比较大),经济压力实在太大,所以她已习惯没有礼物。我今年至少给她买过一条极好的银色/金色项链,呃我是说,她用我的信用卡买完之后告诉我的,差不多是这样吧。

As any husband will tell you; her money is her money, and my money is our money. It’s a small concession to make for wedded bliss, I assure you. At least that’s what my wife Janet tells me.
正如任何一个已婚男人都会跟你讲的,她的钱是她的,而我的钱则是我们的。别担心,这只是对婚姻幸福做出的一个小小让步,至少我老婆珍妮特经常这样对我说。

It was the day before New Year’s Eve. Janet and I still weren’t sure where we were going the next night. Randy and his latest girlfriend were headed to a club about an hour south of US in Rhode Island called Therapy. It opened at ten PM and didn’t close until eight AM on New Year’s Day.
除夕的前一天,我和老婆仍然不确定除夕去哪儿。兰迪和现任女友去了一个叫“理疗”的会所,该会所位于南面的罗德岛州,大约一小时车程,晚上10点开门,直到元旦早上8点才关门。

I was a bit wary of staying out that late. If I did, I would probably need therapy just to get back on track with real life again. And at 36 years old, I was a bit past my partying prime. By three AM, no matter how hopping the club might be, I would be craving a warm bed to crawl into and pass out in, after a warm mug of protein shake and cookies.
在外面待到那么晚我通常都比较谨慎。若出现这种情况,我可能要经过治疗才能回归现实生活。36岁,已经有点过了热衷聚会的年龄了,一到3点,不管会所里有多热闹,我都渴望喝杯热蛋白奶昔吃点饼干后爬上温暖的床昏睡过去。

A Look Back At The Previous Year
回顾去年

But where we went on New Year’s Eve wasn’t important. What was important was that this year was coming to an end, and fast. It was time to look back on the year that had passed and honestly see which goals had been met, and which ones had not. This could apply not only to bodybuilding, but career and personal relationships as well.
除夕我们去了哪儿不重要,重要的是今年很快就要结束了,是时候该回顾过去这一年了,好好看看哪些目标实现了,哪些未实现。这不仅适用于健美,职业生涯和人际关系也同样适用。

Randy and I had been training together a bit more lately, since this was a time of year almost nobody was buying new cars – unless we’re talking about Hot Wheels.
我和兰迪最近一起训练的时候较多,因为这段时间没什么人买新车,除非买的是风火轮(译者注:世界著名车模品牌)。

I didn’t want to get into his work situation as far as sales goals and so on, because the manager at his dealership had that covered, not to mention it bored me to tears.
我不想干涉他的工作情况,销售目标啊什么的,无聊透顶不说,已经有他的门店经理在操心了。

And relationships – that was his deal. If Randy wanted to date a different woman every two to four weeks, as had been the average rate for much of the year, I wasn’t about to scold him and nag him to settle down. But if we were talking about bodybuilding – well, now here’s where I could at last poke my nose into his business.
恋爱方面,如果兰迪想半月或一月换一次女友(今年大多数时间的平均速度),我不责骂,也不叨叨让他稳定下来。但如果换成是健美,我终于能说点什么了。

We had both been doing well on our winter bulking plan. Since Thanksgiving, Randy’s weight had climbed from 212 to 217. A protein bar as a dessert with each meal had certainly helped, along with consistently hard and heavy training. This provided him with about 30 grams of protein and 300 extra calories, which all added up.
我们两个的冬季增肌计划都进展得不错。感恩节后,兰迪的体重从212升到了217。坚持大重量刻苦训练后每餐加一根蛋白棒作为餐后甜点的确发挥了作用,给他总共增加了30克蛋白质和300卡额外热量。

I was now up to 229 in the morning, and 232 by evening. Funny how that works, isn’t it? I swear, if I could just not go to the bathroom for a few days, maybe I could hit 250 – assuming I didn’t die first from the toxic backup. Randy wanted to reach 225 by the first day of spring, and my new goal was 235 (morning weight – after a visit or two to the porcelain throne). That was one goal for the coming year, now it was time to sketch out the remainder.
我现在是早上最高229, 晚上232。觉得不可思议?我发誓,如果我几天不洗澡,或许能上250,当然前提是我没有先死于毒素集聚。兰迪想在开春时上225,而我的新目标则是235(早上一两次大便后称重)。这只是来年的其中一个目标,现在是时候该草拟一下其他目标了。

The Man With The Plan
下达安排

“Randy, I have a plan for you,” I began.
“亲,我对你有个安排。”我说。

“Uh-oh,” he warily replied.
“哦。”他谨慎回应。

“Relax, it’s nothing that involves torture or staying celibate for any length of time.”
“别紧张,不会短期或长期折磨你或让你禁欲的。”

“Same thing,” he stated.
“一回事。”他说。

“There is a contest in September that has a Novice class, with two weight divisions, over and under 175. You would be over.”
“9月份有个比赛,新手组分为两个重量级,175以下和175以上,你体重到时会在175以上。”

“I would hope so.”
“希望如此吧。”

“You are going to win the class, or at least do your d@mnedest to win it. But winning isn’t as important as showing a very noticeable improvement from the New Englands. I want you weighing in at no less than 192 on stage, with a much better chest, arms, and calves.”
“你会胜出,至少拼尽全力后会胜出,但胜出并不重要,重要的是展示自新英格兰大赛后取得的显著进步。我希望你赛前称重时不低于192磅,胸、臂、小腿状态都更好。”

Now, 192 at 5-11 is not a mass monster in modern bodybuilding by any stretch of the imagination. Ronnie Coleman won the Olympia in 2004 at the same height and 296 pounds, though I heard a rumor genetic testing has confirmed he is not human but in fact an entirely new species, Ronnie Sapiens Giganticus. But even without comparing himself to Ronnie, Randy wasn’t too impressed with the goal I had set for him.
一个身高5.11体重192的人在现代健美界无论怎样想像都算不上巨无霸。罗尼·库尔曼以同样身高赢得2004年奥林匹亚先生称号时体重是296,但有传言说基因检测确认他不是人类,而是一个全新的物种——巨型智人。但即使不拿他与罗尼比较,兰迪也对我为他设定的目标不甚满意。

“That’s it? Just eight pounds heavier than last year?” Apparently he thought I was setting the mark too low.
“这就够了?只比去年重8磅?”很明显,他认为我设定的标准太低了。

How Much Muscle Are We Really Talking About?
多还是少

“Eight pounds of pure muscle in the right places makes a big difference in a physique, junior,” I informed him. “I like to use the old analogy Mike Mentzer made famous. He used to tell you to imagine what that amount, in this case eight pounds, would look like if it was raw steak piled on a table in front of you. That’s when you get a better appreciation for just how much muscle it really represents.”
“亲,在该长肉的地方长8磅纯肌肉已经不得了了,身材会迥然不同,”我对他说,“麦克·门泽尔曾经打过一个非常著名的比喻,想象一下那个肉量,就你而言是8磅,如果是那么多生牛排摆上餐桌放在你面前会是怎样一幅情景。这样想,你就对那个肌肉量心里更有谱了。”

“Huh,” Randy said, eyebrows knit in concentration as he no doubt envisioned slabs of meat. “So, once I get to 225, do I start dieting or what?”
兰迪“哦”了一声,双眉紧锁起来,明显是在做相关想象,“那到225后我是开始节食减脂还是什么?”

“Sort of,” I explained. “You should hit that weight by about April. That’s when I want you to very gradually start cleaning up your diet. You’ll still be eating plenty of food, just not as much worthless crap like those muffins and Coffee Coolattas from Dunkin’ Donuts you seem to be addicted to.”
“差不多吧,”我具体道,“你应该在4月份前达到那个重量,然后逐步使饮食健康化,同样要吃很多,只是别吃同样多的无用垃圾食品,比如唐恩都乐的松饼和酷拉塔咖啡(译者注:Coffee Coolatta,唐恩都乐推出的一种冰咖啡),你似乎有点上瘾了。”

“They’re good,” he noted.
“真的很好吃。”他说。

“I’m sure they are. Anyway, I believe you can actually keep gaining muscle until about twelve weeks out when we start limiting your carbs. So when I say 192, I really think you could very well be a few pounds more than that. But by aiming for the lower number, we under-promise and over-deliver.”
“肯定很好吃。不管怎样,我相信你的肌肉会继续增长到第十二周结束,然后就开始限制碳水。192的真正意思其实是192以上,但把目标定低点,保守点,可以完成得更漂亮。”

“Cool. So, I win the show, then what?”
“好吧。那我赢了比赛之后呢?”

“The show is in late September. Once it’s over, you rest up and eat what you want for a week, and then you start packing the muscle on all over again because your body will be ready to grow after the long diet. When we talk at this time again next year, I expect you to be about 230 pounds in the same condition you are now.”
“比赛是在9月底,结束后,你休息一周,爱吃啥吃啥,然后你会再次开始增长肌肉,因为你的身体经过长时间节食减脂后已准备好长肉了。明年这个时候我希望你在同等状态下能达到230磅。”

Conclusion
结语

“Wow, so you have my whole year planned out for me.”
“哇噻,你把一整年都给我安排好了。”

“That’s right. Now if only I could figure out what I was going to do tomorrow night.”
“是啊,我现在都不知道明晚该做啥了。”

Randy thought a moment, then had it.
兰迪想了一会儿,说:

“They’re having something at the planetarium with a laser show, then champagne and cheese at midnight. That’s about your speed, right?” He burst out laughing at his own lame joke. The sad thing, I was thinking about how I could do that and be in bed by one.
“去天文馆看激光秀,然后午夜喝香槟吃奶酪,你应该挺喜欢的,对吧?”对于自己的蹩脚玩笑他噗哧一下笑了。可悲的是,我竟然在盘算着如何能既嗨了又能在1点前上床睡觉。

“Okay, but if you’re not back from that club by noon the next day, I may have you declared legally dead.”
“但如果到明天中午你都还没回来,我可能会依法宣布你已经挂了。”

“You really aren’t going?” he asked.
“你真的不去吗?”他问。

“Kid, I pass the torch on to you. Just make sure you get home with some brain cells left. You’ve got a big year ahead of you.”
“臭小子,你现在是接棒对象,小心别回来的时候脑袋都秀逗了,你明年还要大干一场呢。”

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