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[文化][健身健美][英中对照]健美大神之路 50 不怨天赋

一线实稿 樊明璨 来源:樊明璨博客 219浏览 0评论

健美大神之路(A Bodybuilder Is Born)

作者:罗恩·哈利斯(Ron Harris)

译者:樊明璨

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Episode 50 – Make The Most Of What You’re Given!
第50篇 不怨天赋

Back-to-school shopping sure has changed since I was a lad. My twelve-year-old daughter is about to start the seventh grade. On an average of twice a week since sixth grade ended, my wife has accompanied her to the mall to painstakingly peruse Abercrombie Kids, Pac Sunwear, and Limited Too in search of not just the perfect outfit, but roughly fifty perfect outfits, as well as numerous shoe stores and shops with accessories to compliment them.
从我青年时期开始,返校购物这个传统就有了变化。我女儿12岁,马上读7年级。自六年级毕业后,我老婆平均一周两次陪她去商场逛阿贝克隆比童装店(Abercrombie Kids)、太平洋夏装店(Pac Sunwear)和利米特店(Limited Too) ,煞费苦心精挑细选了不是1套,而是50套满意的服装,还逛了无数鞋店挑选合适的饰品。

You would think, from the amount of money being spent and the time invested that she was entering Beverly Hills Middle School and that I was some sort of corporate tycoon or rock star.
光看所花的钱和投入的时间,你会认为她上的是比佛利中学,而我则是什么企业大亨或摇滚明星之类。

My darling little girl has unfortunately had her developing mind warped by shows like MTV’s ‘My Super Sweet 16,’ in which spoiled-brat princesses alternately whine, brag, and shriek as they prepare for Sweet 16 parties on the scale of royal weddings, complete with bands with current hits in the top 40, formal wear, male models jumping out of cakes and dancing around in thongs, and luxury automobiles that the little snot would probably total in a drunk-driving accident later that evening.
但事实是我这个女儿已不幸被MTV剧《我甜蜜的16岁花季》之类的节目扭曲了尚未成熟的心智。在这个剧里,被宠坏的小公主们在准备王室婚礼般规模的甜蜜16岁派对(包括目前处于前40强的乐队、礼服、穿着丁字裤从蛋糕里跳出来跳舞的男模、小屁孩们当晚晚些时候会将其毁于酒驾事故的豪车)时一会儿抱怨,一会儿吹嘘,一会儿尖叫。

Half of them don’t even have driver’s licenses yet. All of this is financed by wealthy dads that are almost certainly tough S.O.B.’s in the business world, but at home are simpering wussies whose bratty daughters have them wrapped so tightly around their fingers, they might as well just skip their own death and hand everything they own over right now so little Brandi can party away her life in her own tropical beach resort with her ‘posse’ of airhead friends.
一半的小屁孩连驾驶证都没有。所有这一切都由富爸爸们买单。这些富爸爸虽然是商界强人,但在家却是笑呵呵的宠女狂魔,被宠坏的女儿们把他们粘得死死的,他们最好在没死时就交出财产,这样小公主才可以和她的狐朋狗友在自家热带海滩度假地开派对打发日子。

Back In My Day
遥想当年

I exaggerate a bit about my daughter’s wardrobe budget, but this much is true. If she went to a nice private school with a name like “The Wadsworth-Uppity Academy for Splendid Young Ladies”, and wore a school uniform rather than the latest fashions, we would be spending about the same amount of money on tuition as we do on her attire now.
虽然在女儿买衣服的预算上我说得有点夸张,但在很大程度上属实。如果她上的是“沃兹沃思阿皮缇杰出年轻女子学院”之类的高级私立学校,虽然不穿时装穿校服,但在学费上我们会花跟现在买衣服一样多的钱。

In contrast, I still remember my back-to-school shopping at her age, because it all happened the night before seventh grade began. My mom gave me twenty bucks and bus fare to the mall, with which I was able to get a pair of gray corduroy pants from The Gap and an Ozzy Osbourne shirt featuring the cover of his Diary of a Madman album.
与此形成鲜明对比的是我记忆中我在她这个年龄时的返校购物情形。在上7年级的前一晚,妈妈给了我20美元以及坐公交去商场的车费,我用这点钱买了一条灰色的The Gap灯芯绒裤子和一件印有狂人日记专辑封面的奥齐·奥斯本衬衫。

This was back when Ozzy was an anti-establishment figure known for biting the heads off live bats, not for being a shuffling, mumbling father of two spoiled-brat twerp kids that flout his authority and generally make him look like an ineffectual, brain-addled fool on national television. Coincidentally, that show is on MTV too. Seeing a pattern here?
当时奥齐是一名反体制人士,出名是因为咬掉活蝙蝠的头,而不是因为他是两个被宠坏孩子的父亲。作为一个常拖脚走且爱叨叨的父亲,两个孩子并不把他放在眼里,常让他在全国电视上看起来像个无用的头脑混乱的傻X。巧的是,那个节目也上了MTV台。看出规律了吗?

Six Weeks Out
已过6周

Luckily for my young muscle-head protégé, Randy, he was still single and childless, and thus free to wallow in his own imagined misery. Right now he was six weeks out from his contest, and at the point where so many competitors have their big moment of doubt. Generally feeling sorry for themselves, they cry out to the heavens with pained questions such as:
幸运的是我的肌肉小徒弟兰迪现在仍然单身无孩,随便怎么折腾都可以。12周后比赛现已过去6周,在这个节点上,许多参赛者都会产生这样那样的不自信,常常垂头丧气地问苍天:

“Is it even possible for me to get in shape for this contest in time?”
“我还有可能赶在比赛开始前练好身材吗?”

“Why did I get myself into this, and what if I back out now?” And of course, my favorite:
“我为什么要跑来参赛,现在退出如何?”当然,我最喜欢听到的一个问题是:

“Will my wife leave me if my gas gets any worse, and could it be the broccoli? And could stuffing charcoal up my wazoo help keep some of the foul stench from escaping into the atmosphere around me?”
“经常放屁的话,我老婆会离开我吗?这得怪花椰菜吧?把屁股塞满木炭会好点吗?”

Randy wasn’t worried about getting in shape. He had done it before and was right on schedule now to do it again. Cutting down his starchy carbs and replacing them with healthy fats from raw nuts and salmon was helping him keep his energy up.
兰迪不担心练好身材的问题,以前就针对比赛练过,现在只是按部就班再做一次而已。减少淀粉类碳水化合物并用生坚果和鲑鱼的有益脂肪取而代之有助于他保持能量。

Pudding he was making from protein powder and sugar-free hard candy were allowing him to keep his sweet tooth satiated, so this particular diet involved a minimal amount of suffering. But human nature dictates that we are always able to find something to complain about. I ought to know, as I earned the Gold medal back at the Seoul Olympics for the 100-meter B!tching and Moaning event (I don’t like to brag, but the top Belarus guy wasn’t easy to beat). And no, I did not use steroids to win that.
由于他是用蛋白粉加无糖硬糖(sugar-free hard candy)做成布丁来满足自己对甜食的喜好,所以这类特餐其实会让人有一点点痛苦(译者注:因为不能吃正常甜食),但抱怨是人之常情。我在首尔奥运会上拿到“100米牢骚抱怨赛”金牌时就认识到这点了(不夸张地说,要赢那个白俄罗斯顶级选手真的不易),真的,赢这比赛我没用类固醇。

Something To Complain About
抱怨天赋

“My genetics just suck!” Randy bleated as he stood ‘relaxed’, going through his posing as we did at the conclusion of each workout for about fifteen minutes or so. I had heard this one before – not only out of Randy’s mouth, but from countless other bodybuilders, including myself. I knew what to counter this with, too.
“哎,先天条件太差!”兰迪一边喃喃自语,一边“放松”地练习比赛动作,我们每次训练完后都要练15分钟左右比赛动作。这种话我以前就听过,兰迪说过,其他很多健美运动员也说过,包括我自己。我知道如何驳斥这种说法。

“Compared to who? Let me guess, Ronnie Coleman! That’s about as realistic as comparing any other bike racer to Lance Armstrong, a man that probably came out of the womb on a ten-speed and took off for the nearest hill.”
“那要看你和谁比,该不会是和罗尼·库尔曼比吧?!这就好像拿其他自行车运动员和骑着十速自行车从起点出发奔向最近山丘的兰斯·阿姆斯特朗(Lance Armstrong)比一样。”

“Yeah, but look at this,” he flexed a quad. It was good, but it still needed to grow a good deal before anybody started asking him for leg-training tips.
“话是没错,但你看这个,”他鼓起了股四头肌。练得其实还不错,但块头还远远不够,所以现在没人向他请教如何练腿。

“Why don’t I have legs like yours? Your legs were a lot bigger than mine even when you were my age, I’ve seen the pictures.”
“我要有你那样的腿就好了,你在我这么大的时候腿也比我大得多,我看过照片。”

“I don’t know, why hasn’t my waist been as small as yours since I was about thirteen years old and weighed ninety pounds? We’re all different. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. Look at me and my wife Janet, for instance.”
“不清楚,我13岁体重90磅的时候怎么就没有你那样的细腰呢?世上没有完全相同的两个人,人各有优缺点,我和我老婆珍妮特就是活生生的例子。”

“My shoulders have always been good. Big and round, never had trouble building them. My arms, on the other hand, as we all know, have been a struggle all along and continue to be. Then you have Janet.
“我的肩一直很棒,又大又圆,训练上一直很顺利,但我的手臂,大家都知道,一直是个老大难,现在是,以后也是。我老婆的情况正好相反。

Her arms have grown steadily no matter what she did for them. She has peaks on her d@mn biceps like little Mount Everests. But her shoulders are tough to build, as stubborn as arms are for me. When they say opposites attract, this must have been what they meant. Either that, or it’s because she’s super hot and the celebrity I resemble most is Shrek.”
她的手臂不管怎么练都会稳定增长,颠峰时期二头肌就像小珠穆朗玛峰,但她的肩就很难练起来,就像我的手臂一样。他们说的相异则相吸肯定就是这个意思。我们如果不是因为这个走到了一起,那就是因为她很靓,而我长得很像广为人知的怪物史莱克。”

That got a chuckle out of Randy. I actually get Bill Clinton a lot, but Shrek sounded better.
兰迪哈哈笑起来。说实话我更像比尔·克林顿,但说史莱克听起来更酷。

It Just Doesn’t Seem Fair
似乎不公

“It just doesn’t seem fair that there are some guys in bodybuilding with awesome genetics, guys that look like they should be in the magazines even when they are just doing local shows.”
“我觉得有点不公平,有些人练健美的先天条件特别好,打地方赛时就具备了上杂志的范儿。”

“I know, but that’s like saying it’s not fair that some guys in the NBA are so tall, or some tennis stars have such great hand-eye coordination. At least in bodybuilding, at the local and regional level before you start running into an army of genetic mutants, you can do pretty well with less-than-perfect genetics.
“我知道,但这就像说有些NBA球员长得太高或有些网球名将手眼协调度太好不公平一样。就健美而言,暂不和变态比,先天条件差点也可以在地方赛和区域赛上有不错的表现。

I have managed to beat a lot of them. You do that by working harder and smarter and doing the best with what you have. You work on your weak points and bring them up to the best of your ability.
我就打败过好些这样的人,方法就是苦练加巧练,在先天条件基础上做到最好,尽全力完善弱点。

You train and diet and do your cardio and never miss quality meals or supplements so you show up looking the best you can, and in great condition. That way you can beat the guys that were too lazy to work something they didn’t feel like, or who cheated on their diets and blew off early-morning cardio sessions.”
做好训练、节食、有氧,按时摄入优质食物或补剂,然后以最佳状态亮相,这样你才能打败那些偷懒的人,以及在饮食上放纵和不做清晨有氧的人。”

“But Ron, you have still taken second place to a lot of freaks, haven’t you?”
“但即便做到了你说的,你也败给了很多变态,只拿了第二,不是吗?”

“Bastard! I knew you were going to bring that sh!t up. It’s true. I have been runner-up more times than any other bodybuilder in history. But I tell you what, I have beaten some guys I had no business beating, guys that had more genetics in their pinkie finger than I had in my whole body. And it’s because I worked harder than they did, and smarter.
“草!我就知道你会说这个,是,我的确是千年老二,但你要知道,我打败过一些根本不可能打败的人,我整个身体的先天条件还赶不上这些人一个小拇指的先天条件,但我就是赢了,因为我比他们更苦练加巧练。

I did a lot more with what I was given than they did, and beating them despite my many genetic shortcomings was as sweet a victory as winning the whole show.”
我在现有先天条件基础上下了比他们多得多的功夫,尽管存在很多先天弱点,但我还是打败了他们,跟赢了全场冠军一样开心。”

Not So Bad
还不算差

Randy checked himself out again and didn’t seem quite as upset. He hit a crab most muscular, a pose where his wide shoulders and big traps gave him the illusion of being much bigger than he really was.
兰迪重新审视了一下自己,也就不再那么郁闷了。他做了一个蟹展动作,宽阔的肩膀和硕大的斜方肌似乎让他有点飘飘然。

“Not so horrible, I guess. Not Ronnie Coleman, but not so bad.”
“还不错,虽然比不上罗尼·库尔曼,但也不差。”

“Not at all, Randy. I don’t need to sit here and tell you what your strong and weak points are. You already know. You can’t change your genetics, but you can do the absolute most with what you have. You do that, and you are a real success story, regardless of what contests you do or don’t win.
“完全不是那么回事,亲,我不想再说你的优缺点了,你自己心里有数,你无法改变先天条件,但你可以在此基础上尽力完善自己,不管啥比赛,即使输了也好,完善自己才是真正的成功。”

I have a certain amount of respect in the sport because a lot of people know how far I have come over the years. Meanwhile, others with far superior genetics have quit, fizzled out, or just faded away because they weren’t willing to work hard enough to compete against the others with great genetics that were willing. They’re long gone and forgotten, while I am still here hitting it hard and still making small but gradual improvements every year.”
我现在在健美界还算有几分威望是因为很多人都知道这么多年我是怎么熬过来的,而一些先天条件很好的人退出的退出,熄火的熄火,消失的消失,因为他们不想付出努力去和那些先天条件好又愿意努力的人竞争。他们消失很久了,也被大家遗忘很久了,而我至今还在苦练,每年都在逐渐进步,尽管进步较小。

Randy clearly felt better now. He would still have his bumpy moments over the next six weeks. That’s the nature of preparing for a bodybuilding contest. You have your good days when you feel on top of the world, and you have your bad days when you feel like chucking it all in and going on a binge of pizza and beer.
兰迪明显感觉好多了。他在接下来的6周情绪仍然会有所起伏,但备赛就是这样,情绪高涨时觉得世界都在脚下,情绪低落时又想打退堂鼓然后猛吃海喝一顿。

Conclusion
结语

I didn’t envy Randy. But at least his money was his own, and not being thrown into a black hole of pre-teen fashion that was sucking it into some Bermuda Triangle of clothing styles that would be ‘out’ almost as fast as they were ‘in.’
我很羡慕兰迪,至少钱是自己的,不用扔到青少年时尚这个黑洞里,然后被吸进服装款式百慕大三角里,过时速度快得跟被吸进去时一样。

“How’s your personal training business going lately, Randy?”
“亲,最近私教生意如何?”

“Pretty good, I guess, about six regular clients and a few that are more occasional.” I clapped him on the back.
“很不错,6个长期客户,还有一些临时客户。”

“I’ll have to start trying to refer more people to you.”
“我准备多介绍点人给你。”

“Gee thanks, Ron, that’s awful nice of you.”
“谢谢教练,你真好。”

“Not exactly. I need you to make big money because I might need a loan, a big loan, in less than four years. You see, my daughter will be turning sixteen…”
“不全是为你,你赚了大钱我才好找你借钱,三年后我可能需要借一大笔钱,因为我女儿到时就满16岁了……”

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